


Not Enough

by EzzyDean



Category: Free!
Genre: M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-17
Updated: 2014-10-26
Packaged: 2018-02-13 13:02:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 13,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2151687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EzzyDean/pseuds/EzzyDean
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Love isn't always as straightforward as it seems.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I Love You Too

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt from Ruru for MakoRin - Choices or SouRin - Not Enough and naturally my brain went why not both and have them all together?

He had known for awhile now that something wasn't quite right between them.  It was hopefully nothing too serious.  Maybe a little more serious than Rin almost burning down their apartment last summer making their anniversary dinner but nowhere near as serious as when Sousuke's parents had said they 'needed to talk' to him about his choice of partners and his future.  God that had been a night from hell.  The anger of that night still manages to bubble to the surface every once in awhile and he has to remind himself that he's 28 now, far from the kid that his parents seemed to think he was, and that these bouts of insecurity were normal, but largely pointless.  Because if there was a problem he and Rin would discuss it.  They had passed the point of skulking around their issues years ago.

But that didn't change the fact that something was wrong.

Which, since Rin had yet to come forth with any problem, could only mean one thing.  The one thing that always found a way to be a source of discord between them no matter how many years had passed.  The one thing that always found the cracks in Sousuke’s armor and wheedled it’s way in.

Iwatobi.

It’s not as though he hates Iwatobi itself or the members of the swim team.  Not entirely anyway.  But they have never exactly gotten along either, despite Rin’s efforts.

He tries not to let it eat at him too much - when Rin is ready to talk about it he’ll come to Sousuke - and for the most part succeeds.  He succeeds in ignoring the restless way Rin is sleeping.  He succeeds in ignoring the lingering taste of blood when they kiss from Rin unconsciously worrying the inside of his lip with his teeth.  He succeeds in pretending he doesn’t see the way Rin stares at him for far too long, dissecting his actions and silence.

It’s so far out of his mind that what he overhears in line waiting to pay for his groceries doesn’t even fully register.

_He’s not even trying to overhear them he’s simply waiting in line between a wrinkly old lady and some teenagers.  The teens are, as they often do, talking louder than they most likely think they are.  The girls giggling about some teacher and they boys laughing at the girls._

_“Oh my gosh.  Have you seen the new Literature teacher?”  One girl giggles and swoons a little._

_“Tachibana-sensei?”  Another pipes up and there’s a chorus of giggles and sighs and Sousuke shifts his basket from one hand to the other, idly scanning the display of treats on the counter.  Maybe he should get a candy bar for the trip home. Rin still isn’t fond of sweets but a little chocolate had never hurt Sousuke this far.  His hands hover over two choices that are equally delicious in his opinion._

_One of the boys pipes up.  “I saw him talking to Matsuoka-sensei after classes today.  I heard they used to be friends when they were younger or something.”_

_Sousuke decides on the plain chocolate bar - he’s feeling rather simple today - and places his stuff on the counter._

_He’s back home unloading things onto the counter when it hits him._

“Tachibana-sensei?”  He sets down the bag of rice he had been about to put in the cupboard and stares at the counter.  “Tachibana-sensei.”  It makes sense now.  Why Rin has been so hesitant to broach the subject of what’s bothering him.  It’s not just one of the Iwatobi guys.  It’s Tachibana.  He gets everything put away and is sprawled on the couch when Rin comes home.

Rin drops his bag on the kitchen table and peeks into the living room.  “Sou?”  Sousuke waves his hand over the back of the couch and Rin laughs.  “Long day?”  He steps in front of the couch and Sousuke grabs him and pulls him down.  He nuzzles his face in between Rin’s shoulder blades and Rin wraps his fingers around Sousuke’s wrists.  “What’s up?”

They’re cuddled onto the couch and Sousuke can feel that trickle of insecurity making it’s way through his stomach.  “It’s Tachibana isn’t it?”  Rin stiffens and takes a deep breath in surprise.  “The reason for the restless sleep and midnight runs.  The extra laps in the pool.  The tension.”

Rin lets out his breath.  “He’s the new Literature teacher at school.  He started a few weeks ago.”

“And?”

“And I don’t know.  He hasn’t changed that much since graduation.  He’s still Makoto.”

“And I’m not.”  Sousuke mutters and buries his face in Rin’s neck.

“Sou.”  He ignores the pity in Rin’s voice, not that Rin probably even realizes he sounds pitying, and shakes his head.

“Just tell me you’re not fucking around with him.”

“Fuck Sousuke.  No.  I’m not.  You know that.”  Rin’s voice drops to a whisper.  “You know me.”

“I do know you.”  Sousuke sighs against Rin’s neck.  “I also know it can’t be easy for you and I’m not trying to be a jackass.”

“Being a jackass is a natural talent when you’re as blunt as you are.”

“Ha ha.  I’m serious.”

“I know.  It’s just so weird.  Last week when I told you I went for coffee with a colleague?  It was Makoto.”

“Ok.  So?  What happened?”

“We had coffee.”  Rin says matter of factly.  He shrugs and settles back into Sousuke’s embrace.  “He asked me about the school and if I was coaching swimming.  He asked me if you and I were still together and what Gou was doing now.  We talked about Haru and the others.  Talked about the twins.  Chatted a bit and then went our separate ways.”  Sousuke waits, because he knows that there’s something else Rin wants to say, he’s known him long enough to know when his silences are simply him trying to figure out how to phrase something.  “And I just don’t fucking know.”

Sousuke lets it drop for now.  They cook supper together like usual.  Sousuke showers while Rin does some work.  Rin showers while Sousuke cleans up the house.  They eventually fall into bed together and curl up.

“I’m not him.”  Sousuke whispers.  He sounds bitter and petty and right now in the moonlight bathed room he doesn’t care.  “I’ll never be him.  I don’t have his humor or his softness or his kindness.  I don’t wear my heart on my sleeve and pet kittens in my spare time.  I’m harsh and rough and a jackass.”

“I know.  You’re not him.  You’re you.  I love you.”

“You love him too though, right?”

“I don’t know.”


	2. Doors Close... But Is Anything Else Open?

Things don’t change.  Not really.  Sousuke is still Sousuke.  Rin is still Rin.  They are still in love with each other.  But Sousuke can’t quite get rid of that niggling feeling of not being enough for Rin.  That little voice that whispers that his parents were right and he doesn’t deserve to be happy with Rin.

Rin goes to school, teaches, goes swimming, goes for coffee with colleagues who are sometimes Tachibana.

Sousuke does his computer work, jogs, swims with Rin, gets groceries.  He doesn’t bother trying to spy on Rin’s outings with Tachibana.  He trusts Rin enough to know Rin wouldn’t cheat on him no matter what the voice in his head tries to say.

Rin sleeps a little better now that he knows Sousuke knows about Makoto being here and that Sousuke isn’t mad at him.  If anything Sousuke is too damn kind and generous and understanding and Rin just doesn’t know how Sousuke doesn’t see that in himself.

Sousuke is good at a lot of things - a fact which Rin will happily attest - and one of those things is pretending nothing is wrong.  So he shoves thoughts of Tachibana and Iwatobi and high school and middle school into a box in his mind and locks it up.  He’s at the grocery store lost in his own thoughts; memories of this morning happily drifting through his mind.  Snow is about to fall and Rin was complaining he wouldn’t be able to swim in their pool for a few months and Sousuke had jokingly called him Nanase.  Which had led to a lot of laughing and a pillow fight and then a quick round of sex before Rin had to hurry out to make it to swim practice on time; it’s never good for the coach to be late after all.  

He’s still wrapped up in those thoughts and wondering if Rin would want to do hot chocolate and a movie tonight when he bumps into someone.  He immediately moves to apologize and instinctively glances down to look at the person.  Only to realize whoever he bumped into is nearly as tall as he is.  “Oh, sor-” his eyes lock onto a familiar green pair and his voice falters, “ry.”

“Ah, Yamazaki?”

“Tachibana.”  He grits out.  Sousuke does not want to make Tachibana hate him, he never has despite his previous attitude.  He is Rin’s friend so Sousuke wants to be as nice as he can for Rin’s own peace of mind if nothing else.  He realizes, belatedly, that Tachibana has said something and he shakes his head.  “Sorry, I’m a little distracted today.  What was that?”

“I asked if you wanted to maybe get a cup of coffee later?”  Tachibana blushes a little and rubs at his cheek.  “It’s kind of silly and really forward of me but I still haven’t really had a chance to make any friends here and it gets a little lonely spending every weekend at home.”  He looks so hopeful that Sousuke sighs.  It’s for Rin, he tells himself, because Rin will be so happy to come home and hear that Sousuke has made an effort and reached out to one of Rin’s friends.

“Why not.  We can go now.”  He can come back later for the handful of groceries he needs and he lets Tachibana lead him to a nearby coffee shop.  He is surprised to find that, despite their differences, they actually don’t have much of a problem talking.  He expected some kind of tension or distrust or grudge for the way he had acted in the past.  But Tachibana’s smiles were sincere and his eyes sparkled with enjoyment when Sousuke told him about Rin’s attempt to burn the apartment down last summer.  “We moved into our house this spring.  It has a pool, which was probably the only reason Rin agreed to it.”

“He still swims a lot then?”

“He’s pretty focused on being a teacher and loves coaching but he swims when he can.”  And just like that the snake of insecurity he had caged up in the back of his mind springs free.  Rin is still taking late night jogs and dips in the pool to help clear his head because of the whole Tachibana business.

“Yamazaki?”  Tachibana starts to reach out for him but stops when Sousuke sits up straight and scowls at him.  “Is something wrong?”  

“Rin is going to kill me for saying this.  But this has all gone on long enough.”  Tachibana leans back in his seat and waits.  “There’s not really a simple way to say anything so I’ll just get it out I guess.  Rin likes you.  A lot.  He always has.”

Tachibana looks at him with confusion.  “I like Rin too.”  He replies slowly.

“Ugh.  Everyone likes Rin.”  Sousuke sighs.  “I mean he likes you as in he loves you.”  Color drains from Tachibana’s face and Sousuke waits.

“But you two have been going out for years.  Since high school practically.”

“Yeah.”

“How long has he,” Tachibana gestures at himself and blushes, “you know, liked me?”

“A long time.”

“But-”

Sousuke leans forward and props his forehead on his hand and stares at the table.  As if the patterns on the top would tell him a way to make this less awkward.  “Look I know it’s hard to grasp but he’s kind of always had a thing for you.  I accepted it a long time ago.  And it hasn’t been an issue.  But here’s the thing I love Rin and will spend the rest of my life with him if I can.  And I have no idea where you fit into all this.  But I just thought you should know because Rin is such a romantic and you know how he is and I just don’t know that I could deal with him pining away after you now after all these years and I just-”  Sousuke freezes and forces himself to stop talking when Tachibana lets out a soft huff of amusement.  “Shit forget it.  I gotta go.”  He shoves himself back from the table and hurries out.  God he just made a fool of himself in front of Tachibana and spewed way more about Rin than Rin would probably ever want Tachibana to know.  It was a stupid idea to agree to come here and he blames it all on Tachibana’s stupid droopy kicked puppy look when he asked Sousuke to join him.

“Ah, Yamazaki, please wait.”  Tachibana’s voice carries through the crisp mid-morning air and he almost keeps walking as he reaches into his pockets for his gloves.  Only to realize he left his jacket in the shop.  Tachibana catches up to him and holds out said jacket, cheeks pink from the cool air and voice breathy from the sudden jog.  “I apologize I wasn’t laughing at you, not really.  It’s just that I think that’s the most I’ve ever heard you say at one time to someone that wasn’t Rin.”  Sousuke snatches his jacket away and shrugs into it as Tachibana hunches into his own and blows at his hands to warm them up.

“Thanks,” Sousuke mutters and stuffs his hands into his pockets for his gloves.  Tachibana gives him a cheerful smile and nods.

“No problem.  It’s kind of my fault you left in a rush.”  Sousuke opens his mouth to say, well, something, but Tachibana hurries on.  “I don’t really know how to take this news of yours or what you want me to do about it.  I won’t tell Rin you told me but I’m sure he’ll figure it out soon.  He’s pretty perceptive when it comes to his friends and the people close to him.”

Sousuke runs his now gloved hand through his hair and eyes the cloudy sky.  “That’s the problem.  I have no idea either.  Rin doesn’t really even know how he feels about things.  All I know is I’m pretty sure I’m not enough for him anymore.”

Tachibana glances at his watch and startles at the time.  “Wow I have to get back and call home before the twins get antsy.  It’s my parents’ anniversary next month and we’re planning a surprise party,” he says with a fond smile.  “Try not to worry too much about Rin and his choice.  I’ve always felt that Rin has more room in his heart than most people.  You know a bigger capacity to love more than one person equally, if that makes sense.”

It doesn’t but Tachibana waves at him before hurrying off towards, what Sousuke assumes is, his apartment.  He trudges back to the store, cold air biting at his lungs, and tries not to think about his whole encounter with Tachibana.  It’s not until he glances at his own watch in line that he realizes that they had spent nearly three hours just chatting at the coffee shop.  Strange really since he can never remember saying more than a couple sentences at a time to Tachibana.  Maybe that’s what Rin meant when he had said something about Tachibana being easy to talk to back in high school.

 

Sure enough just as he predicted it doesn’t take long for Rin to find out that he had told Tachibana.  Rin rushes into the house and nearly slams the door shut in his haste.  He kicks off his shoes and throws his bag onto the kitchen table before stomping down the hallway into Sousuke’s office.  He nearly rips the headphones from Sousuke’s ears.  Sousuke spins in his chair to confront Rin but stops when he sees the flare of anger in Rin’s eyes.  “You told him,” Rin spits out through clenched teeth.  It’s a statement, not a question, and Sousuke sees no reason to start lying to Rin now.  He’s always tried to be honest with Rin after it blew up on him in high school.

“I bumped into him a couple weeks ago and he invited me to coffee and we talked.”

“You fucking told him I loved him.”

“I wasn’t planning on it.  We started talking and then he asked about you swimming.”

“How does that lead to telling him I love him?”

“Because it reminded me that you had, and still have, been taking late night jogs and swimming in the pool because you’re trying to work things out and it just came out.  I told him before I even realized I said anything.”  Rin stares at him and Sousuke can see the anger burning in his eyes.  But there’s no pain or loss from Tachibana’s rejection.  Just pure anger at his secret being outed.  “Jeez that guy should have been a freaking therapist or interrogator or something.”

“You had no right.”

“I’m sorry.  It was an asshole move but, as we’ve established many times in the past, being an awkward asshole is kind of part of who I am.”  Sousuke shoves back from the desk without bothering to save his work or anything and heads down the hallway.

“Where are you going?” Rin asks as Sousuke slips into his shoes and makes a grab for his jacket.  Rin holds the jacket behind his back and looks up into Sousuke’s glare.

“Well you’re pissed off at me so I figured I’d give you some space.”

“I am pissed.  But I want you here.”

Sousuke reaches around Rin’s back to grab at his jacket.  “So you can yell at me?”

“Yes.”  Rin’s grip on the jacket tightens and he refuses to let go.  “But also so we can talk.”

That cold feeling hidden in Sousuke’s mind grabs onto his spine and refuses to let go.  “Rin,” he says as calmly as he can, “the last time I ‘had a talk’ with someone I wound up almost disowned and unable to talk to my parents for the better part of a year.”

“I’m not going to disown you,” Rin sighs and before he can finish Sousuke lets out a bitter laugh.

“No you’re just going to dump me.”  He yanks the jacket from Rin’s suddenly loose grasp and pulls it on.  He’s out of the house and down the block before Rin can even react.

“Fuck.”  Rin groans and slaps his palm against the closed door.

Sousuke doesn’t come back that night.  It’s the first night since sometime just after high school that he hasn’t come home without telling Rin what’s going on.


	3. The Feeling is Mutual

It’s not like he doesn’t want to be here it’s just… man who is he kidding?  “Here” is the last place he wants to be.  “Here” being at Tachibana’s family home helping to celebrate Tachibana’s parents’ anniversary.  Rin had gotten the invitation as a former almost permanent childhood resident and family friend in general and Sousuke couldn’t tell him no when he asked him to come with.  Even though he had known he would barely know anyone here since most everyone was family or a close friend of Tachibana’s parents.  If nothing else it was a way to show Rin that while yes he is a jerk and he tends to react strongly sometimes he is still here for Rin and wants to support him and his friends.

“You’re Rin’s boyfriend right?”  A teenage girl leans up against the wall beside him with a smile.  Her almost olive-green hair pulled up into a stylish bun leaves him no doubt that she’s one of the Tachibana twins.  Not only does her hair match her older brother’s her easy smile does too.  Sousuke makes a noise of agreement and takes another swallow of his punch.  He thinks Rin may have given him a spiked glass or something because it’s making him relax and his fingers are starting to feel heavy.  “I remember Mako talking about you a couple times when he was in school.”  Sousuke scoffs and she laughs softly.  “I’m not kidding.  I think he said that you helped focus Rin even more?  Helped ground him?  I don’t remember exactly but basically I think he said you were good for Rin.”

Sousuke blinks down at her and tries not to scowl.  Damn Tachibana was too damn nice to everyone.  Especially him.

“Ran!  There you are.”  Tachibana comes over and pushes the girl towards a group of people near the center of the room.  “Mom and Dad want you two in the middle for some pictures.”  She rolls her eyes but leaves with a smile.

“She’s definitely your sister,” Sousuke mutters.  Tachibana turns away from the group and looks at Sousuke.

“Is that so?”

“Yeah.  She’s way too friendly to people too.”

“You think so?”  Sousuke eyes Tachibana for a moment, trying to decide if he was mocking him, and then downs his glass.  “You need more punch?”  He lets the glass be taken from him and goes back to watching the room and doing his best not to look menacing.

A few hours later the house is mostly empty.  The Tachibana parents were on their way to a hotel in the next town over and then on to a cruise for a week and the twins were on their way back to their dorms.  Tachibana and Rin were hanging around cleaning up.  Nanase, Sousuke was sure he had seen him a few times that night, was suspiciously gone and he figures he slipped out the door and back home when the cleanup started.  In Sousuke’s defense if Rin hadn’t been spiking his punch he would be happy to help clean if for no other reason than to go home sooner.  But he is, instead, on the couch trying not to slump over as the room dances and spins and goes fuzzy on him.

He closes his eyes for just a minute and then feels something warm settle next to him.  He leans into it on instinct and misjudges his distance and winds up slipping all the way over.  His new pillow shifts as it laughs quietly and pats his head gently and he drifts off to sleep for just a moment.

“He is going to be so sore when he wakes up.”  Rin settles next to Makoto and gives Sousuke a once over.  Sousuke is on his side with his head pillowed on Makoto’s lap and his legs hanging off the couch.  One hand is tucked under Makoto’s leg and the other is dangling onto the floor and Rin is sure it’s probably asleep and numb.

“This is never the most comfortable couch to sleep on,” Makoto agrees and turns to Rin.  “Why did you spike his punch so much?”  Rin blushes a little at being caught, not that he had been trying to be sneaky about it.

“A couple reasons.  One being he’s too stiff at things like this in general.  Even more so considering you and all.  Another reason being that he would have bolted us both out of here the second he could have had he been functional.  Mostly just because we haven’t exactly had the easiest of times around each other lately and I just wanted him to relax a little.”  He smiles and runs his fingers through Sousuke’s hair.  “I just really feel like I am screwing everything up.”

“I honestly have no idea what to tell you.”

“It really doesn’t bother you?”  Makoto looks up from where he had been watching Rin’s fingers running through Sousuke’s hair.

“That you love us both?”  Rin nods and looks away.

“Surprisingly no.  It’s a very Rin thing to do.”

Rin’s voice raises a little.  “What does that mean?”  Sousuke shifts in his sleep and Rin grimaces before lowering his voice.  “How is it a “Rin” thing to do?”

“It’s hard to explain but like I told Yamazaki that day we had coffee I’ve just always felt like you have more room in your heart than most people.  Like you would be able to fully and equally love more than one person at a time.”

“I’m not sure that makes sense Makoto.”

“Neither am I.”  

Rin lets out a soft laugh and shakes his head.  “You know I honestly thought you two would both hate me when you found out.  Like I was betraying you both.  And I definitely never expected us all to be able to be in the same room together after I found out that Sousuke had told you.”  

Makoto settles backwards into the couch and stretches his arms across the back of it while he thinks of how to respond.  “Well,” he begins, “I’m sure if you had said this to us back in high school it would have been that way.  Yamazaki was even more protective of you back then and I can be that way too.”  Rin nods in agreement.  “But we’re all more mature now.  We know the world isn’t quite as simple as we thought it was, even in high school.”

“That is very true.”  Rin tucks himself against Makoto so he can keep running his fingers through Sousuke’s hair and lean into the couch at the same time.  The day’s events and the last couple weeks of stress between Sousuke and himself are starting to catch up to him and he yawns.

“You know I’ve always liked you but I’ve never really let myself think about loving you.”

“Why not?”  Rin stifles another yawn and wipes sleepy tears from the corner of his eye.

“Because you’ve always been his.  And I wouldn’t try to take that away from you two for anything.”

The only thing Rin can think of to say is, “Oh.”  They sit quietly for a few minutes and then Makoto feels Rin’s head drop onto his chest.  Another minute later he starts quietly snoring, just quiet little puffs of noise, and Makoto lets out a sigh.

“You know,” Yamazaki’s voice is thick from alcohol and sleep and Makoto startles a little at it, “you’re not a bad person at all.  I’m glad that if Rin had to fall in love with another person it’s you.”

“Thank you Yamazaki.  I feel the same about you.”  Makoto isn’t even sure that Yamazaki hears him because he’s already asleep again and Makoto just leans his head against the back of the couch and wishes he had remembered to shut the light off before sitting down.

 

Sousuke wakes up with a groan and moves to throw his hand over his face.  Except his arm isn’t quite cooperating and he only manages to smack himself in the face instead.  “Damn it,” he grumbles and starts to hide his face in his pillow.  He freezes as he realizes that his pillow is a fairly hard thigh and that the last thing he remembers is sitting on the Tachibana’s couch waiting for Rin to finish cleaning up so they could leave.  A warm hand, far too large to be Rin’s, is resting on his side just above his waist and he can hear Rin’s soft snoring coming from somewhere just above his head.  He already knows it’s Tachibana’s thigh he’s using for a pillow before he even cracks an eye open.  It worries him, given the situation between them, that it doesn’t really worry him.  Because despite the fact that his arm is numb and he can feel his legs trying to cramp up from the strange positions he obviously contorted himself into overnight he’s comfortable here.

At least until Rin slips from wherever on Tachibana’s chest he had been resting his head and cracks his forehead into the side of Sousuke’s face.  Rin wakes with a start as Sousuke starts cursing and shoves Rin to the floor.  “That hurt,” Sousuke snaps as Rin looks up at him.  Rin blinks away the tears of pain forming and rubs his head.

“Oh well sorry not like I did it on purpose,” Rin snarls back.  He reaches up and shoves at Sousuke’s face but doesn’t do anything other than aggravate his headache.  And churn a sudden bout of nausea up in his stomach.  Sousuke groans and suddenly the hand on his waist moves up to cover his eyes and block out the harsh sun.

“Rin,” Tachibana’s voice is stern and Sousuke almost wishes he could see the look on Rin’s face right now.  “Go get a glass of water and some aspirin.  This,” Sousuke is sure Tachibana is gesturing to him, “is your fault after all.”  Sousuke wants to protest that he can take care of himself but Tachibana has one hand covering his eyes and blocking out the sun and the other is running through his hair and massaging his scalp and he almost feels like he could just go back to sleep here.  He’s starting to zone out and doesn’t even register that Rin has come back until Tachibana stops moving his hand and speaks.  “You think you can sit up for some water and aspirin?”  Coming from anyone else, Sousuke decides as he warily sits up and holds out his hand for the goods, that would sound almost demeaning.  But coming from Tachibana it just seems like genuine concern.  He grimaces as the cold water hits his throat.

“Hey, Sou?”  Rin asks quietly as he rests a hand against his cheek.  Sousuke feels the couch shift as Rin kneels on it.  “Are you okay?  I just wanted you to relax a little last night.”  Someone, Tachibana probably, takes the now half empty glass from his hand and he waits a moment before flopping back onto the couch and dragging Rin with him.

He doesn’t even care that he winds up using Tachibana’s lap as a pillow again.  He’s just content to lie on his back with Rin sprawled on top of him while the sun creeps into the living room.  When they eventually leave he looks at Tachibana and gives him a small smile.  “I meant what I said after Rin fell asleep, you know.”  

Surprised green eyes meet his.  “I did too,” Tachibana responds after a moment.  Sousuke nods and leads the way out of the house leaving Rin looking between them in confusion.


	4. I Don't Dislike You

A few weeks later he once again runs into Tachibana at the store and winds up at the coffee shop for a chat.  “Hope this ends better than last time,” Sousuke mutters as he eyes the snow covering the ground outside the window.  Tachibana’s laugh is cheerful, but nervous, and Sousuke looks at him with interest.  “So.”

“This is going to be awkward enough so I’m just going to avoid the small talk.”

“Ok.”

“What would you think about us dating Rin?”  Sousuke stares at Tachibana’s bowed head.

“You mean like have a, what’s the word, polyamorous relationship?”  

Tachibana nods his head.  “Like we can both date Rin or,” Sousuke watches as Tachibana nervously rolls and unrolls a napkin in his hands, “we all date?”  The tips of Tachibana’s ears turn pink and then red as Sousuke remains silent.

“Well,” he finally says quietly and Tachibana starts a little, “I never really considered that solution.”

“I haven’t mentioned anything at all to Rin so if the idea bothers you we can just forget that I said anything.  Actually we can forget it anyway.  I just, I don’t know.  Sorry.”  Tachibana’s voice is nearly a whisper by the time he finishes and he scoots his chair backwards to leave.  Souske stands up as well and follows him out.  They both shiver at the cold and bundle further into their jackets and scarves.

“So are you saying you want to date me?  That you like me?”  Sousuke teases as they head back towards the store.

“Well I don’t dislike you.”

After a moment Sousuke laughs.  “I don’t dislike you either.  I guess.  Not anymore anyway.”  Tachibana shoots him a glance as they enter the store.

“Not anymore?”

“High school me was a dick sometimes.”

“Present you is one sometimes too.”  Tachibana’s eyes widen and his cheeks burn red, all the way to his ears, in a flash and Sousuke laughs.  “I am so sorry.  I don’t normally say stuff like that.  I didn’t mean-”

“Tachibana,” his mouth snaps shut but the red doesn’t fade from his face, “it’s okay.  Seriously.  Rin and I say stuff like that all the time.  If you’re going to date us you don’t need to hold yourself back.”

“So the idea doesn’t bother you?”  Tachibana asks cautiously as they get the things they need and head to the checkout.

“Like I said I had never considered it.  You should mention it to Rin and see what he says.  In the end it’s his choice as much as either of ours.  Maybe even a little more.”  They part ways and Sousuke wonders how long it will be before Tachibana works up the nerve to talk to Rin.

Not long apparently since he gets a text from Rin later that day.

[ _Going out for coffee with Mako after school.  See you tonight_.]

Sousuke leans back and cracks his back on his desk chair before saving his work.  He stares at the ceiling and lets his mind wander.  He meant what he said to Tachibana; he really had never thought about it before and it wasn’t like he hated the guy.  In fact it seemed like the more they saw each other now that they were older the more they seemed to get along.  But all of them dating?  How would that even work?

Flashes of Tachibana’s parents’ anniversary party come to mind and he remembers the feeling of waking up with Tachibana’s hand warm on his side and Rin’s breathing steady above him and then the feeling of Tachibana’s hands soothing his headache as Rin got him water and aspirin and suddenly he realizes that there’s a chance it wouldn’t be too difficult.  As long as they all talked.  Which, of course, is one of the things that he knows he and Rin both suck at a lot of the time.

But he remembers the feeling of contentment from lying on the couch and using Tachibana’s lap for a pillow.  The way his stomach tightened when Tachibana’s ears turned red with embarrassment.  The way Rin has always smiled when he and Tachibana managed to get along.

Maybe… maybe they could make this work.


	5. Movie Night

Rin laughs as Makoto tucks his head in between Sousuke’s shoulder blades and whimpers.  “It’s not funny Rin.  Why do we always watch scary movies?”

“I told you you could pick but you left it to me.”  Rin grins as something pops up onto the screen just as Makoto looks up and one of Makoto’s arms tightens around Sousuke’s waist.  “Just admit it you like having something bigger than you to hide behind.”

“Well it’s definitely more comforting than hiding behind you,” Makoto snaps and buries his head into Sousuke’s neck.

“Rin,” Sousuke warns and Rin rolls his eyes.

“Fine,” he mutters as he flops onto his back and drops his feet into Sousuke’s lap.  He grabs the remote and flips through the channels to find a less gruesome movie.  Makoto refuses to untangle himself from Sousuke even when they start watching the rom-com Rin flips to.  His breath is warm on Sousuke’s neck and Sousuke lets himself relax into Makoto even as Makoto relaxes against him.  He dozes off at some point and wakes to the sound of Makoto and Rin talking softly about some school policy or something and he just lets himself drift on the sound of their voices.


	6. Coming Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nonny asked for Sousuke coming out to his parents and then this happened.

“In the end it’s your choice,” Rin tells him with a soft smile, “but you know they’re going to start to wonder eventually.  Especially since… well you know.”  He gestures towards Sousuke’s shoulder.  “Not going to university for swimming.  Not having practice eating up all your time.  They’re going to question why you spend all your free time with me.”  Sousuke shrugs and glares out the window.  Of course he knows he’ll have to come out to his parents eventually.  He was just hoping for another few years of being able to dodge their questions about girlfriends and romance by using his focus on his swimming for an excuse.  “Whatever you decide I’m here for you.”  Rin presses a kiss to his forehead before he slips into his shoes.  He’s heading back to his mom’s house for the last of his things he needs to officially move into their university dorms.

Sousuke knows that he needs to talk to his parents.  He’s just not sure how to explain it to them.  Hell in an ideal world he wouldn’t have to explain anything.  He could just show up at his parent’s house with his arm around Rin’s waist and introduce him as his boyfriend.  Unfortunately the world has already proven to be anything but ideal he thinks as he rubs at his shoulder.  So he does the only thing he can think of at the time: shove it to the back of his mind and concentrate on his studies.

For the most part it works.  He goes to classes, does homework, picks up a really crappy paying part time internship job at a local office, stops by the pool to watch the swim team from time to time, goes home and spends most of his free time with Rin.  He pretends that the watchful look that he sees in Rin’s eyes when he declines yet another family event claiming his heavy school schedule is catching up to him is nothing more than his concern that Sousuke may be staying up too late.  He pretends he doesn’t see the glimmers of doubt in Rin’s eyes when he dodges his parent’s questions about finding a nice girl to spend some time with when they call him.

Sometimes he feels like Rin deserves so much more than him.  Brief moments of doubt where he wonders if maybe Rin wouldn’t have been better off if Sousuke had just encouraged him to follow up on his crush on Tachibana instead of blurting out about his own crush on Rin.  At least then he’s sure Rin wouldn’t feel like he was being hidden away.

It’s not like he’s ashamed of Rin or of being in love with him.  It’s just that not every parent and family is as accepting as Rin’s is.  For the most part no one in their dorm cares.  No one on the swim team does.  No one who they come in contact on a semi-regular basis really even looks twice when Sousuke presses a kiss to Rin’s cheek before he heads into the locker room.  No one bats an eye when Rin drapes himself across Sousuke’s lap in the dorm lounge.  No one cares that they’re two guys.  So it’s easy to forget that other people aren’t as… open minded.

It’s always been so easy for him to get caught up in Rin, swept away by his passion and drug along at his pace.  It’s easy to forget that a kiss for good luck before a swim meet can bring such curious stares.  It’s easy to be overwhelmed by the giant grin on his face when he breaks another school record at a competition and looks up into the stands for Sousuke.  It’s easy to simply pull him into his arms the moment he steps out of the locker room and not let go until they make it back to campus.  It’s easy to simply hide away in the world he’s once again built for himself.

It’s hard when it comes crashing down on him when his Dad sends him a text.  Four words that send a wave of worry through him.

_We need to talk._

“Sure you don’t want me to come with,” Rin asks.  Sousuke considers it briefly but the yawn that slips from Rin’s lips makes his decision for him and he gives him a kiss.

“Just get some rest.  I’ll text you if it’s important.”  His dad had refused to give any clue as to what exactly it was they needed to talk about so he simply told him he’d be home for the weekend.  He hadn’t heard anything since Tuesday.

“Text me even if it’s not.”  Rin demands with a frown and Sousuke chuckles.  He gives him another kiss.

“Ok.  But don’t whine at me if I wake you up.”  Rin pouts and sticks his tongue out even as he crawls into Sousuke’s bed.  He knows Rin will sleep there until he comes back, that he’ll breathe in Sousuke’s scent from the sheets and pillows until he can wrap himself up in Sousuke’s arms again.  The thought gives a measure of comfort as he rides the nearly empty train back towards his parent’s house.  It’s hard to believe it’s been nearly half a year since he’s been back.

He smiles politely at his parent’s neighbor as he shuffles up the walkway.  He shouldn’t feel so reluctant to return to his parent’s house.  He grew up here after all, it should still feel somewhat like home, he thinks as he knocks once to let his parents know he’s back before entering.  Just the fact that he feels the need to knock when he knows they know he’s coming back feels wrong.

They’re sitting at the kitchen table when he comes in and his father gestures for him to take the seat across from them.  The last time they sat like this - with this stern look on his father’s face and this disapproving look on his mother’s - was when they had found out he had broken the neighbor’s window and lied about it.  “I didn’t break another window again or something did I?”  He tries to joke but the words catch in his throat and he shifts uncomfortably.  His father slides a newspaper article across the table and Sousuke frowns down at it.

**New Record for Rising Swim Star**

It’s about Rin’s last race and his mouth twitches up into the start of a smile.  A smile that drops before it can even form as he registers the pictures accompanying the article.  There’s one of Rin with his team just after the race and the other is of Sousuke wrapping him in a hug and kissing his cheek from before the race.  The pictures blur as he tries to focus in on the blurb underneath them.  Something about Rin’s team smashing their way through numerous records and wondering if Rin has a some kind of “good luck charm” in the form of the tall man he’s often seen with.

He’s not entirely sure what happens in the next couple minutes.  Just that his father is asking if there’s anything that Sousuke would like to tell them and his mother is asking him questions about Rin and saying something about knowing they’ve always been close but that she didn’t think it was something like _this_.

“Something like this?  What do you mean by that?”

“I know you’ve never really shown any interest in girls and dating but I always figured it was just a phase,” Sousuke cringes and tries to tamp down the irritation growing in his gut, “that once you got past the swimming you’d find a nice girl.  But it wasn’t swimming keeping you from that was it?  It was him.”  He’ll never be sure if it’s the way she’s talking to him like he’s a petulant child or the way her tone seems change like she’s referencing some lesser being when she indicates Rin that makes his irritation bubble over.

“It’s always been him,”  Sousuke states.  He sounds a lot calmer than he feels.  But it’s true.  It’s always been Rin.  Rin’s dream he tried to chase along with him.  Rin’s ultimate team he had to be a part of.  Rin’s spirit and fire and passion and love that had consumed probably from the very first day they had met as children.  Even as a child - he realizes this now - he’s never wanted to settle for anything less than Rin.

“It’s not that we’re questioning Matsuoka’s worth or anything,” his father pulls the clipping back towards himself and glances at it, trying to figure out how to word what he wants to say, “it’s just that we want you to be sure you’re thinking properly about things and not just…”

“Just what?”

“I’m sure that after everything with swimming and your shoulder,” his mother puts a hand on his arm and he tenses, “you’re a little rattled and unsure of where you’re headed.”  She pats his arm gently as if he were a small child who was merely upset about having to stay inside because of a cold.  “So we don’t want to see you doing anything that will jeopardize your future.”

“You think Rin is a phase?  You think me dating Rin is going to jeopardize my future?”  His mother makes a noncommittal noise as her eyes linger over his shoulder.  He feels a swell of rage rising from his gut.

“Imply my decisions are clouded all you want.  Call me a fool for not taking care of myself.  But do _not_ even begin to imply that any of this is Rin’s _fault_.”

“Sousuke,” his father warns, “don’t raise your voice to your mother.”

“We just want you to be happy.  To have a happy future.”

“And you think I can’t have that with Rin?”

“No,” his mother states quietly and he pushes away from the table, “I don’t think you can.  It’s just not normal.”

There it was.  Being with Rin made it so easy to forget that to a lot of people what they were, what they had, wasn’t normal.  He stands up and gives the article one last look.

“I, uh, guess I shouldn’t be expecting an invitation back for family dinners anytime soon, huh?”  His mother folds onto the table and drops her head onto her arms with a shuddering breath.  His father just watches him as he grabs his bag from the floor and slips into his shoes.

He almost wishes there had been yelling, cursing, something.  Something other than this almost silent dismissal.  As if this aspect of him didn’t even deserve notice.  He doesn’t slam the door on his way out.  Doesn’t shed a tear as he walks away from his parent’s house and wondered, briefly, when exactly it had stopped being home.  He does send Rin a quick text as he heads to the train station.

_Things didn’t go so well.  Not staying at my parent’s place tonight.  Gonna visit the wildlife._

The response is about what he expected but it still makes him smile.

_Miss you til you get back.  Tell the kids I say hey.  I’ll be here when you get home._

He zones out most of the trip and doesn’t even realize his phone has gone off again until he steps off the train and wonders if he should let them know he’s coming.

_Your mother and I just want the best for you.  I hope you can realize that.  I think it might be better if you take some time to figure things out before you come back again._

Sousuke has never really been a violent person, Rin’s the one who channels his frustration into action, but he nearly crushes his phone as he stomps out of the station and down the familiar path towards Samezuka.  It’s easy to get a visitor’s pass, especially since the person behind the desk at the dorms remembers him, and he soon finds himself knocking on a familiar door.

“Hey Duckling,” he bites out as the blue eyes stare up at him in surprise, “I know it’s kind of short notice but mind if I crash here tonight?”  Ai doesn’t ask many questions after Sousuke assures him that he and Rin aren’t fighting which is part of the reason he chose to come here.

That and the fact he wasn’t sure he could face Rin just yet.  Because as much as he was pissed off and as much as he hated to admit it, part of him wondered if just maybe his parents were right to question his choices where Rin was concerned.

\---

“And that’s basically how that went for me.”  Sousuke stretches out on the couch when Makoto stands to grab a bottle of water.  He takes the bottle and smiles when Makoto comes back and simply slides himself under Sousuke’s legs.

“You forgot the part where you got extremely depressed, changed your major, practically started living in the library and computer labs, and more or less broke up with me for four months,” Rin states.  He stumbles out of the bedroom with a yawn and gives them both a quick kiss before wandering into the kitchen to rummage through the fridge

“There was that too.”  Rin laughs and shuffles into the living room with them and debates a moment before crawling on top of Sousuke and flopping on him.  “I try to limit the amount of “jackass things I did in the past” stories that I share with people in one day.”

“Your parents practically disowning for a year was not a jackass move on your part.”  Rin glares down at Sousuke and Makoto can tell this is a conversation they’ve had a lot over the years.

“I know that.  But it’s early and I was saving my jackass story allotment for later.”

“You say that like you have a lot of jackass moments to share with Makoto.”

“I do.  I’m a natural jackass.”

“Sousuke.”  Rin frowns and pokes at his cheek.  “Don’t be like that.”

“It’s okay, Rin.  I think Makoto knows almost as well as you do the kind of asshole I can be on a bad day.  It’s just part of who I am.”  Rin looks over his shoulder at Makoto who can only shrug in return.  In a way Sousuke was right, though Makoto doesn’t and has rarely ever taken offense at what Sousuke says.  He’s a very blunt person but that’s just the way he is.  Makoto doesn’t really want him any other way either.

“I appreciate you sharing but why did you suddenly seem so eager to tell me?”  Makoto runs one hand along Sousuke’s leg and rests the other on the back of Rin’s thigh.

“Because my parent’s invited me to a family dinner and I want you to come.”  He takes a deep breath.  “Both of you.  As my boyfriends.”

It goes… better than expected actually.  Rin had explained with flushed cheeks and a scowl that Sousuke’s parents had finally come around to the idea of Sousuke and Rin dating about a year after his little fallout with them.  One of the first things Sousuke’s mother had said in a quiet aside to her son was that she could at least see why Sousuke was fond of Rin because he was a very beautiful man and almost feminine looking in the right light.  That wasn’t it at all but Sousuke didn’t really feel like pressing the issue.  His father had explained that he truly did want nothing more than for his son to be happy and if this is what made him happy they would do their best to understand.

So when Sousuke walks in with Rin and Makoto just behind him he hopes for the best.  Hopes he can explain that this makes him happy and that that will be the end of it.  Surprisingly it more or less is.  His father asks if this is what they want and if they’re happy.  Makoto makes some almost sappy statement about being blessed to be in a relationship with Sousuke and Rin and that sharing a life with them makes him happier than he could imagine.  Rin tries not to roll his eyes because _he’s_ supposed to be the romantic gushy one and even he’s blushing at that.  Sousuke’s mother just seems a little in awe of Makoto.  “He’s just as big as you are,” she whispers loudly to Sousuke and Rin blushes even harder because his mind immediately goes to very inappropriate discussions they’ve had and Sousuke’s mother, thankfully, mistakes his blush for embarrassment about his smaller frame.  “Not that it makes you any less radiant looking, Rin.”  She beams at him and he smiles back, silently daring Makoto or Sousuke to even breathe wrong about the assumption.

“Well,” Sousuke says as they walk from the station back to the house.  He’s busy watching the stars in the sky and has one arm looped through Rin’s.  He’s confident enough that Rin won’t intentionally lead him straight into a lamppost.  Not with Makoto here anyway.  “That went much better than last time.”

“No disowning this time.”  Rin guides him down the sidewalk and takes a step closer to loop his arm through Makoto’s.

“No yelling,”  Sousuke replies.  “I liked that.”

“Hopefully no breaking up for four months?”  Sousuke looks at Makoto with his mouth slightly open, surprised.  “Well I just got moved in.  I’d hate to have to find somewhere else to live.”  

Rin doubles over, laughing, until tears form.  “I’m sorry,” he wheezes out when he sees Sousuke frowning at him.  “You just looked so offended.”

“I sometimes forget that Makoto has just as much of a sarcastic mouth on him as you do some days.”  Rin pouts and turns away, linking his arms in Makoto’s again and tugging him up the sidewalk.

“Someone’s sleeping on the couch tonight.”  Rin calls back as they turn the corner and Sousuke jogs to catch up to them.

Makoto may have been the one who said that he was happier than he could imagine but Sousuke understood that feeling pretty well himself.


	7. Gymnophoria

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gymnophoria - The sensation that someone is mentally undressing you.

Regardless of the location or situation - sitting around the table, visiting with his parents, picking up the twins from after school activities, standing in front of his classroom - the moment Makoto becomes aware of it his cheeks flush.  His hands twitch and fingers curl towards his palms, he gets a drop of sweat rolling down his spine, he feels the heat creeping from his cheeks to his ears.  He’ll take a deep breath and glance to the side.

Rin has the decency to blush a little when he gets caught staring at Makoto like that.  Sousuke tends to simply raise an eyebrow like he’s challenging Makoto, daring him to say or do something about it.

They’re undressing him with their eyes, laying him bare in their minds, and it shouldn’t be that distracting to him.  They’ve both seen him in jammers multiple times over the years and they’ve seen him in a hell of a lot less in recent months; especially when Rin popped into the bathroom last week thinking it was Sousuke in the shower and not Makoto.  But getting that feeling of being peeled apart, layer by layer, until he’s bare is still unsettling.

He doesn’t know if he wants it to stop or if he wants to just give in and yank them both down onto the bed.

—

It doesn’t bother Sousuke, not really, when he catches one of them staring at him.  Maybe it’s because he sees them less than they see each other so he really likes the attention.  Maybe he wants them to be watching him that way.  Maybe he just wants the three of them to tumble in to bed together finally and get rid of this crazy sexual tension thing they have going on.

There’s only so many times the three of them can “accidentally” walk in on the other before they all crack.  (If asked directly he would be more than happy to admit that it is no accident that he wanders around in his boxers over half the time and is always  _this close_  to catching Makoto in the middle of changing or getting dressed after a shower.)

Rin and Makoto both blush nicely when he catches them staring at him.  He’s not entirely sure why Rin does.  They’ve been together plenty of times over the years.  He wishes he could see inside Rin’s head and find out just  _what_  is making him blush after all this time.  Not that he minds.  He likes the hint of red at the top of his cheeks and the way he tends to nibble on the corner of his lip when his eyes go unfocused.  Makoto has a tendency to hold his gaze a little longer than Rin does when he gets caught.  He still looks like he’s scandalized and worried Sousuke will be upset with him.  But he stares into Sousuke’s eyes a little longer as a touch of red licks across his cheeks, mouth parted ever so slightly and it takes every ounce of Sousuke’s will not to pull him into a kiss that sets their blood on fire.

Even if they’re in the middle of the grocery store.  Especially if they’re in the middle of the grocery store.

—

Rin does not like feeling so exposed.  It’s a thrill for a short while.  A rush like when he dives into the water at the start of a good race.  But before long everything is stripped away and it scares him a little.  They both have very hungry gazes.  He wonders if they realize it.

He’s not scared of them.  They won’t hurt him.  He’s more scared of his willingness to cave into them.  He’s always been romantic and sappy and a dozen other things Sousuke likes to tease him with but he’s also always been strong.  Uncompromising.  Unwilling to bend to the whim of others (because his own whims are far more tantalizing in his mind.)  But when they look at him like that, when they yank off his clothes with their eyes and spread him out in their minds, he wants to yield.  He wants to curl up in their heated gazes and just let them have him.

Makoto tends to fumble a little when Rin catches him and Sousuke just smirks at him like he knows exactly what Rin’s thinking - he’s probably right.  But it’s not his fault that Makoto and Sousuke are so damn similar.  He has a type, okay, and they both match it pretty well.  Wide shoulders, bright eyes, easy smiles that send sparks through him.

He has feelings for them, and they both have a thing for him (if the way he catches them staring at his ass is any clue) but sometimes he worries about how they connect with each other.

At least until the day he turns from the stove, kitchen filled with a heat that licks at his belly and makes his fingers tingle, and sees that it’s Sousuke that Makoto is directing that surprised, caught with his hand in the cookie jar gaze at.  Sousuke’s eyes flit to Rin for only a moment before returning to Makoto and Rin feels a little bad for Makoto.  Because he knows the full force of those eyes.

He shrugs a little and leaves them to their staring contest.  Maybe he doesn’t have to worry about them being compatible after all.


	8. Eternal Days

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from tumblr: MakoSouRin - Eternal

There are some days Makoto never wants to end.  Days he wishes would go on and on for eternity.  Today is not one of those days.  Today he wants to come home from the school, crawl into bed, and sleep until next week sometime.  He’s spent the last week reading and grading essays and trying to shake off the cold that’s had him in it’s clutches.  Technically he’s lucky because this cold started as more of a flu with Sousuke and then knocked Rin off his feet for three days and hung around for another five.  Makoto, lucky him, was the last to get it and after two days of mild nausea he’s stuck with a lingering constant headache and just general exhaustion at being the one to take care of two grown men who are equally whiny and needy when sick.

When the last student leaves he packs up his stuff and heads to the teacher’s room to grab his jacket.  A confused smile settles on his face when he spots Rin sitting at his desk and poking at the little cat figure the twin’s gave him when he got the teaching position.  ”What’re you doing here?  I thought you had practice after school today?”  Rin leans back in Makoto’s chair and flashes him a smile as he reaches out for his hand.  Makoto returns the gesture, curling his fingers around Rin’s for a moment before reaching past to grab a handful of papers from his desk.

"I’m here to walk you home, of course."  Like it was something they did everyday.  One of the other teachers laughed softly and Makoto’s cheeks flushed a little.  No one minded the relationship he, Rin, and Sousuke had, even if a couple had expressed confusion about it, but none of them were overly affectionate people in public so even the small display of hand holding was enough to make Makoto blush.

"But practice?"  Rin shakes his head and hops up, helping Makoto into his jacket and hooking his arm through Makoto’s elbow.  He slings both of their bags over his shoulder and leads Makoto out, tossing a friendly wave to the rest of the teachers.

"My captain can handle things today.  And I’ve got some favors with the other coaches that I called in and they’ll keep an eye on things for me.  I probably didn’t even need to call in the favors.  My swim team can’t have their _favorite_ Literature teacher too sick and exhausted to continue teaching after all.”  Makoto blushes again.  He knows that he’s a favorite among many of the students and Rin’s swim team is no exception.  He has at least half of them in his classes and the other half seem to visit their teammates frequently enough he knows most of their names.  Rin continues to talk as he guides Makoto to the train.  It’s nothing of import, just random stuff that has happened the last couple days, funny stories about swim team shenanigans and articles he’s been reading in his spare time.  Fluffy chatter meant for Makoto to gloss over and space out to as Rin guides him home.

Sousuke greets them both with a smile in the kitchen after Rin tosses their jackets onto hooks and drops their bags on the table.  He slips over and presses a quick kiss to Sousuke’s cheek and then before Makoto can do anything, like head to the bedroom to change or simply collapse on the couch in his work clothes and sleep for a week, Rin wraps his arms around his waist and starts pulling him out of the kitchen.  Sousuke steps up and wraps his arms around his waist as well and ushers them down the hallway.

"What are you two up to?"  Sousuke simply hums innocently and when Rin opens the bathroom door and steps aside he nudges Makoto inside.  Warm air hits him and he can already feel his sinuses clearing up as Sousuke starts unbuttoning his shirt as he tries to process what’s happening.  His moment of confusion clears when he sees the steam rising from the bathtub and in no time at all they have him stripped and settling into the warm water.  The temperature is nearly perfect and he groans.

"Just let Rin take care of you in here then we can eat and we’ll put you to bed."  Sousuke’s voice is soft and his lips are warm against Makoto’s as he turns his head and draws him into a kiss.  He presses another one to his forehead and stands, giving Rin a wink before leaving.  Rin pulls his shirt over his head and tosses it into the hamper before kneeling next to the tub and gently pushing Makoto until his back leans against the tub.

"Now then," Rin says.  His fingers run through Makoto’s hair and down his neck and his eyes drift shut.  "Just relax."  He kisses Makoto’s cheek and shoulder and pulls his hand from the water to kiss the inside of his wrist, getting a shiver and a deep breath in response, and he smiles.  "Just let us take care of you today.  Okay?"

Makoto nods and feels Rin’s hands skim down his chest to cup some water and soak his hair.  Maybe today could wind up being an eternity kind of day after all.


	9. Insecurity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nonny asked: Oh well now I have to ask for it. Can you write about Sousuke and Makoto giving their absolutely stunning boyfriend Rin a massage.

There would always be a touch of insecurity at times between them no matter how much they knew they all cared for each other.  Makoto sometimes worries that he stepped between them and will pull them apart.  Sousuke occasionally wonders if Rin wouldn’t just be better off with just Makoto.  Rin has times where he thinks that he’s far too selfish to even deserve either of them.

 

He likes being able to see their marks on each other, see their impact on each other’s lives.  He likes seeing Makoto and Sousuke getting their clothes mixed up.  He likes seeing Makoto’s favorite cereal next to his own in the cupboard.  Likes the way he sometimes mixes up his bottle of body wash with Sousuke’s and winds up smelling like him all day.  The others feel similar he knows; he’s seen the way Makoto’s eyes light up when Sousuke wanders into the kitchen in Makoto’s jogging clothes instead of his own and the way Sousuke smiles when he hugs Rin and catches a whiff of his own soap.  

But sometimes they get a little rough with each other.  A little too eager to burrow their way into each other’s lives and leave signs of their passing. Makoto might wake up with scratches down his back.  Sousuke with bruises on his hips.  None of them minded no matter how much they teased the others about it.  Rin gets a little embarrassed when the hickeys on his neck and shoulders are spotted by the swim team on occasion when he’s showing them something in the water but he doesn’t truly mind them.  

They feel a little guilty when they get rough with each other but even more so when they get rough with him.  Rin bruises easier, he always has, and his skin is lighter than theirs so the marks stand out more the next morning; the bites and bruises and scratches a stark contrast to his pale skin.  Tracing them when he wakes up the next morning always sends shivers down his spine as he drifts through the memories.  He likes them in all honesty and he’s told them as much, blushing and huffing but looking them in the eye and telling them that it’s perfectly fine.

They still feel guilty when they wake up the next morning with Rin curled between them or sprawled on someone’s chest and they spot the reddened skin on his back still slightly swollen from their nails or the dark bruises on his hips or hickeys scattered across his shoulders.

"So then make it up to me," he had said one time as a joke.

So they do.

Today is one of those rare days when Rin wakes up alone in bed.  He stretches and winces a little as his muscles softly protest his actions.  Yesterday had been a long day that ended with Sousuke’s parents inviting them to a family get together.  Things weren’t bad with Sousuke’s family - nothing like it used to be - just uncomfortable sometimes.  So by the time they got back they all wanted nothing more than to fall into bed and remind themselves of how important they were to each other.  How important they were together.

Which is why when Rin finally sits up and lets the blanket fall to his waist he spies a series of small bite marks trailing across his stomach and he can feel his lower back twinging a little as he rolls his shoulders and waits.  As cool as the mattress on either side of him is he figures that they’ve both already showered and should be coming back soon and sure enough a couple minutes later the door opens.

Sousuke comes in with a bowl filled with what looks like the fresh fruit they had bought the day before and some toast on a small plate and Makoto is right behind him with a couple mugs of Rin’s favorite tea and a cup of juice.

"Morning."  Sousuke gives him a kiss and slides into bed next to him.

"Morning," Rin murmurs back and then kisses his jaw a couple times as Sousuke arranges the blankets and settles the bowl in Rin’s lap.  Then he takes the mugs from Makoto, who sits on the other side of Rin and kisses his cheek before settling against the headboard with his glass of juice.

This was part of their way of “making it up” to him.  Breakfast in bed with his favorite tea.  He leans back and snuggles into Makoto’s side and Sousuke nabs a grape that slips out of the bowl during the move and pops it into his mouth.

"Morning, Makoto."

"Good morning Rin."  Makoto runs his fingers through Rin’s tangled hair as Rin munches on a piece of toast.  Sousuke feeds him a few pieces of fruit and hands over his tea when he gestures for it.  "Feeling okay?"  Makoto grabs the other piece of toast and bats away Sousuke’s fingers when he tries to take it from him.  They smack at each other’s hands for a minute until Rin huffs and grabs the toast, ripping it in half and tossing it at them.

"I worked hard at making that toast Rin."  Sousuke pouts at him but quickly eats his half.

"So very hard I can tell," he responds.  A movement against his stomach makes him look down and he can’t help but smile at the sight of Makoto and Sousuke’s hands clasped together and resting on his stomach.  "And I feel fine.  Better once I remembered that it’s only Saturday and we still have a week of vacation left."  By the time they’re done eating Sousuke has slid down with his head against Rin’s hip and Makoto is rubbing soothing circles on Rin’s lower back with his thumb.  Their hands are still tangled together which makes Rin smile again.

All of their doubts about each other seem so silly when they’re curled up like this.

Makoto eventually pulls away to grab the dishes and take them to the kitchen and Sousuke curls up against Rin’s side even more and nuzzles into his hip.  ”Anything special you want to do this week?”

"Is staying in bed all week an option?"  The look Sousuke is giving him is just this side of completely intoxicating and Rin grins.  "You heard me right."  The sound that comes from Sousuke is a nice mix of whimper and groan that makes Rin laugh as Sousuke buries his head against Rin’s hip.

"Who heard what?"  Makoto has a hip propped against the doorway and a fond look on his face.

"Rin wants to stay in bed all week."  The calculating look that flits into Makoto’s eyes as he watches them makes Rin shiver a little and Sousuke rolls and adjusts and tugs until they’re both under the covers and Sousuke is wrapped around him like a human blanket.

"Well," Makoto says as he kneels on the bed and then crawls up until he’s holding himself over them both with a grin, "I think there should be some bathroom and shower and food breaks.  But if that’s what Rin wants we can definitely do that.  You’ll hear no arguments from me."  Sousuke laughs against Rin’s neck and nods in agreement.  "But.  First things first."

First things first involves a massage that has Rin turning into a pile of mushy human putty under Makoto and Sousuke’s fingers (along with gentle kisses tracing along the marks from the night before) followed by a long warm bath where Makoto washes everything from his hair to his toes for him and it ends with Makoto carrying him back to the bed which now has fresh sheets and extra pillows thanks to Sousuke.

Sousuke is sprawled on the bed and when Makoto comes in he opens his arms so Makoto can hand Rin over and then crawl in after him.  After a few minutes of playful nudging each other’s hands out of the way and arranging Rin this way and that they finally settle.

Insecurity may rear it’s ugly head once in awhile but it was always soon replaced with this.  He’s warm and content and wrapped up by his two favorite people in the world and he starts to drift off as Makoto draws random patterns on his hip and Sousuke drags his fingers along Rin’s arm.  A smile rests on his lips when he feels Sousuke scoot closer and settle himself so he can talk to Makoto above Rin’s head.  He tips his head forward and nuzzles under Sousuke’s chin.  Soft voices murmur above him occasionally interrupted by equally soft kisses and he lets himself melt into their warmth.


	10. In Sickness....

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nonny asked: makosourin for 43 or 46, please? (43 & 46 - pool & fever)

Makoto isn’t entirely sure who convinced him of what by this point.

He knows one of the other two is to blame, possibly both of them, for their innocent little late night dip in the pool turning positively adult rated.

But when Sousuke is already naked and against the pool wall pulling at Makoto’s shoulders and waist until Makoto has him boxed in and Rin is constantly moving, hands flitting from Sousuke to Makoto and back again in a random pattern that has him dizzy he can’t really pinpoint who is more at fault.

"The pool isn’t heated you know," he manages to get out in between harsh breaths when he breaks away from Sousuke’s lips.  Only to have them move down to his jaw and neck and he whimpers a little when Rin presses against his back - he can feel how hard Rin and Sousuke both are like this - and starts in on the other side of his neck.  "It’s cold out," he tries again as Rin’s fingers tease at edge of his swim trunks and Sousuke’s thumbs rub circles against his lower back.  They still haven’t stopped working at his neck. "One of us is going to get sick."

He hears the wet smack of his swim trunks hitting the cement and then Sousuke pulls them flush against each other and he stops worrying.

—

Sousuke tries not to let his disgust show as he plucks the tissue from the nightstand.  He obviously fails judging by Rin’s raspy chuckle.  He rolls his eyes, about to say something snarky until Rin sneezes and then groans, nuzzling deeper into his blankets with a shiver.

"Need some more tea?"

"Want soup."

He tries not to meet Makoto’s eyes as he switches to the other side of the bed and collects the snotty tissues on that nightstand.  He knows what will be there.  What he’ll see in those glazed green eyes.  Had anyone told him years ago that Makoto would have the most self-satisfied “I told you so” stare out of anyone Sousuke had ever met he would have laughed at them.  Because really?  Tachibana “Actual Saint” Makoto?  Guilt gets the better of him and he glances up for a moment and actually blushes.

It’s not just a stare.  Makoto is giving him an full on “I told you so” glare and Sousuke feels about an inch tall right now.

"Sorry," he mutters before he shuffles out of the room.

He kind of wishes he was sick too.  At least then no one would expect him to take care of them.

He’s gotten better at it over the years with Rin and even more so over the last year with Makoto - taking care of people that is.  But no matter how good he is getting at back rubs and hugs and cuddling the fact of the matter is he _sucks_ at taking care of sick people.  He didn’t even like dealing with his own snotty tissues and fever sweat damp sheets so dealing with his two boyfriends being sick was hell.

—

The pot on the stove taunts him, as does the array of ingredients spread out on the counter.  A soft laugh filters into his ear and he blushes.

"It’s alright, dear.  You’ll do just fine."  Hearing that kind tone and soft laugh, so much like her son’s, relaxes him a little.

If he had been the sick one he would have been content with a can of soup from the store.  But this was Rin who had asked and Rin could be picky, especially when sick, and Sousuke felt guilty.  Guilty enough to want to make it himself even though his cooking skills were even worse than Makoto’s were.

So he had called the only person in his phone who he could think of to help him: Makoto’s mother.

She had been surprised at his call but was more than happy to help him when he explained the situation.  He left out the fact that Makoto and Rin were both sick because they had spent most of Friday night making out and having sex in and around their pool of course.  But with the way she laughed gently and hummed at his explanation of them catching some bug going around school he was pretty sure she knew, more or less, the truth.

It turns out much easier to make than he thought it would be, definitely much easier to make than the recipes and directions he had found online had been, and when she tells him to take a spoonful of it and taste it he’s surprised to find it tastes good.

"You’re not as hopeless in the kitchen as you think you are, dear."

"Thank you."

"Now.  Go nurse my other boys back to health and make sure you don’t get sick yourself.  We’re expecting you all for dinner next Saturday."

"Yes ma’am."

Rin is… skeptical of the soup when Sousuke brings it in.  Even more so when he tells them it isn’t store bought.

Rin frowns at his bowl and then looks distrustfully at Sousuke.  “You can’t cook.”

Sousuke pouts a little.  “If you don’t want it then don’t eat it.”

Makoto takes his bowl carefully and takes a deep breath through his nose, as best as he can in his current state anyway, and smiles a little at the familiar smell.  After a moment of listening to Rin and Sousuke bicker back and forth he swallows a spoonful with a happy hum.

"It’s good."  Rin looks from Makoto, contently swallowing spoonfuls of soup, and back to his own bowl before cautiously raising a spoonful to his lips.  His shocked reaction would hurt Sousuke if it wasn’t for the fact he knows how much he sucks at cooking. 

It’s not long before Makoto is finished and Sousuke takes the bowl from him and presses a kiss to his forehead.  “It’s not quite like my mother’s,” Makoto whispers to Sousuke with a knowing look in his eyes as Rin slurps his way to the bottom of his bowl, “but it was good.  Thank you.”


End file.
